in Humor (Puns / Jokes)
They're all deserting me. I've been too kind. Spare the rod and spoil the fun. Oh, for the glands of a Bismarck.
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Humor
President Obama is going to take two weeks to unwind, as opposed to President Bush, who never wound.
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in Humor (Puns / Jokes)
It is better to have loafed and lost, than never to have loafed at all.
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in Humor (Puns / Jokes)
I am deeply suspicious of one who carry martinis to the lunch and dinner table.
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in Humor (Puns / Jokes)
She forced me to become avant-garde and take my clothes off, when all I wanted was to be Tom Jones.
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Let me tell you something that we Israelis have against Moses. He took us 40 years through the desert in order to bring us to the one spot in the Middle East that has no oil!
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in Humor (Puns / Jokes)
Ignorance. Forgivable, except in a responsible job willingly undertaken.
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Osama bin Laden was living in that compound with three wives. It's like he was Newt Gingrich.
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in Humor (Puns / Jokes)
The ultimate of quietude.
The Do Not Disturb sign in a garden.
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in Humor (Puns / Jokes)
Sentimental irony is a dog that bays at the moon while pissing on graves.
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